shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
another moral hangover. fuck.
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Every concussion has its silver lining
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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