How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
