I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
