just tell him i said nine months
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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