hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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