you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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