Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize
