check it out our google latitudes are spooning
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
