yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
you will always have a special place in my vag
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
