i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
