My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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