He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
Randomize
