This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
And then my night got REAL pukey
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
