But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
