We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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