My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
