How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
