Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
