The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
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