apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Randomize
