You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize