i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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