Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
