I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
