Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
