You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
