Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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