My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
