4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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