grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
