I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
