I want to walk on stilts...naked
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
