Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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