i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize