I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
It's shark week go big or go home
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
