Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
