No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
