who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
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