I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
