We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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