Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
