I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
We are two peas in an std pod
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
