Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
