Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
