In the future we'll all be gay
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
