Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Randomize
