That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
