You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
