I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
A+ Viking dick
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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