You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
